And When Did You Last See Your Father?
What do you think of when you imagine a typical family lawyer? Someone with a cold heart, a pinstripe suit and an aggressive attitude? Someone who will promise the world to a client, but secretly relish a battle between two bewildered people and make lots of money in the process? It’s an easy stereotype, and family solicitors often get a pretty bad press. However, whilst the prevailing image may have been true perhaps at one point in history, it doesn’t reflect reality now. A quiet revolution has taken place in the last ten years in Kent and experienced family lawyers today invariably try to steer their clients away from acrimonious family disputes towards more friendly alternatives.
Although financial separation can be deeply upsetting, most parents find explaining changes to their children the most difficult, and they often have no guidance in how to do this. As a result, children can suffer immensely and sometimes permanently. For example, did you know that 80% of children who ran away from home last year in the UK said that they did so because they were experiencing family problems at home? Were you also aware that 20% of these children were under the age of eleven?
Family lawyers see these problems and consequences on a daily basis, but they also recognise a universal truth: although parents commonly feel angry about the circumstances surrounding their divorce or separation, they both want the best for their children and can unite to achieve this if they are given the right tools. To help provide the right advice, more and more solicitors are joining a national solicitor organisation called Resolution, which lobbies the government for changes to the law so that parents and couples are offered a more conciliatory approach to resolving issues which doesn’t have to cost the earth, financially and emotionally.
Allied with this, solicitors in Kent and elsewhere are training in great numbers as collaborative lawyers, a practice borrowed in part from America. Within this process, the couple try to resolve their differences around a table with two specially trained solicitors, who are there to advise their respective clients, but also to encourage a constructive atmosphere and emphasise the need for each person to focus upon the birth of a new type of relationship, rather than the death of the old one. This is intended to ensure couples are empowered to control the negotiations themselves rather than deferring to third parties and to place the needs of any children at the heart of discussions.
Even if collaborative law is not an option for certain couples, Resolution lawyers in Kent are spearheading seminars run by mediation teams designed to explain to parents how to ensure that their children’s needs are considered first when they divorce or separate permanently. Kent is one of six pilot regions for ‘Parenting after Parting’, courses which take place over a morning and are designed to provide parents with the tools to approach children and explain what the family are planning to minimise the suffering and sense of loss often experienced when children feel they are outside the decision-making process.
The new coalition government have promised to look closely at expanding the use of family mediation, recognising that at present, there are more and more people without legal representation and faced with a potential fight through the courts for contact with their children or for a fair financial settlement. Whilst solicitors in Kent have always seen the value of mediation as a cost-effective tool to resolve some disputes, especially involving children, there are more and more solicitors improving their skills to offer a mediation service as part of a package of options to assist clients with resolving problems.
The role of family lawyers is changing rapidly, and the practitioner of the future is going to need a completely new set of skills to offer a service which their clients expect. However, most Kent solicitors welcome this new focus and relish the chance to talk to clients about their aspirations beyond the simply financial so that parents can stay good friends when they separate and children remain secure and happy in a new environment.
Although financial separation can be deeply upsetting, most parents find explaining changes to their children the most difficult, and they often have no guidance in how to do this. As a result, children can suffer immensely and sometimes permanently. For example, did you know that 80% of children who ran away from home last year in the UK said that they did so because they were experiencing family problems at home? Were you also aware that 20% of these children were under the age of eleven?
Family lawyers see these problems and consequences on a daily basis, but they also recognise a universal truth: although parents commonly feel angry about the circumstances surrounding their divorce or separation, they both want the best for their children and can unite to achieve this if they are given the right tools. To help provide the right advice, more and more solicitors are joining a national solicitor organisation called Resolution, which lobbies the government for changes to the law so that parents and couples are offered a more conciliatory approach to resolving issues which doesn’t have to cost the earth, financially and emotionally.
Allied with this, solicitors in Kent and elsewhere are training in great numbers as collaborative lawyers, a practice borrowed in part from America. Within this process, the couple try to resolve their differences around a table with two specially trained solicitors, who are there to advise their respective clients, but also to encourage a constructive atmosphere and emphasise the need for each person to focus upon the birth of a new type of relationship, rather than the death of the old one. This is intended to ensure couples are empowered to control the negotiations themselves rather than deferring to third parties and to place the needs of any children at the heart of discussions.
Even if collaborative law is not an option for certain couples, Resolution lawyers in Kent are spearheading seminars run by mediation teams designed to explain to parents how to ensure that their children’s needs are considered first when they divorce or separate permanently. Kent is one of six pilot regions for ‘Parenting after Parting’, courses which take place over a morning and are designed to provide parents with the tools to approach children and explain what the family are planning to minimise the suffering and sense of loss often experienced when children feel they are outside the decision-making process.
The new coalition government have promised to look closely at expanding the use of family mediation, recognising that at present, there are more and more people without legal representation and faced with a potential fight through the courts for contact with their children or for a fair financial settlement. Whilst solicitors in Kent have always seen the value of mediation as a cost-effective tool to resolve some disputes, especially involving children, there are more and more solicitors improving their skills to offer a mediation service as part of a package of options to assist clients with resolving problems.
The role of family lawyers is changing rapidly, and the practitioner of the future is going to need a completely new set of skills to offer a service which their clients expect. However, most Kent solicitors welcome this new focus and relish the chance to talk to clients about their aspirations beyond the simply financial so that parents can stay good friends when they separate and children remain secure and happy in a new environment.
We have lawyers who are members of the above organisations.